small pieces of joy

pieces of joy in each day

voice to sorrow

on August 15, 2014

“Give voice to sorrow. Lend words to loneliness. Make heard the depth of your despair and the breaking of your heart. 

For what remains unspoken can never burst into healing song.” –Safe Passage

This is why I share my grief on my blog.

Not to make people feel sorry for me. Not to make people fearful of being sad. Not to wallow in my sorrows.

But to heal.

Giving voice. Lending words. Making heard.

So I can burst into healing song.

I won’t hide the fact that losing my Dad hurts. I love him too much to do that. 

I won’t hide the fact that being sad is exhausting and really really hard. Because it is.

I won’t hide the fact that losing my dad and grandpa affects everything I do. Because it does.

I’m not hiding because grief should be talked about. It should be shared. It should be something we do together, even if you don’t know how.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with crying all the time. With wanting your family fully together again. With acknowledging how painful it is to lose someone you loved with all your being. 

And I want people to know that. Especially those that think they shouldn’t cry, or shouldn’t be sad, or should just move on.

You NEED to cry. You NEED to be upset. You NEED to talk to God, or yell at Him for that matter. You NEED to take care of yourself.

There is no way out of grief except through it. 

God gave us our emotions and they are meant to be felt. Fully. Even the tough ones. When you’re ready, of course. 

I guess that means I’m there. 

And that is why I blog. This is why I share the good AND the bad.

To give voice to my sorrow, in order for me to be able to come out of this grief singing. 


3 responses to “voice to sorrow

  1. Keithy says:

    As you know, this really hit me this week. I don’t want to acknowledge that I’m sad and lonely all the time, but that’s the way it is and needs to be to feel better.


    • Kari says:

      I think it is hitting pretty hard now because we’re reliving so much from last year, and it’s slowly starting to sink in. It’s going to be a long ride, but I’m glad we’re in it together.


  2. Kathy Flentie says:

    Kari, You were blessed with a God given talent for writing. It is wonderful that you use this creative outlet to help you “go through” your grieving process. I am so proud and thankful of how mature you and Keith (and Kirk, too) have grown over this experience. Becoming a mother would have brought about a new sense of maturity, but both life changes at the same time has brought about the very best in you. As adults, you and Keith are such a blessing to your mother and your grandmothers, too. I’m thankful Kirk is having a “normal” return for this semester. I love you all from the bottom of my heart (Abdul asked me one year, “Mrs. Flentie why don’t you love me from the top of your heart?” I told him it was a great question, and then the entire class just smiled and laughed.) I am absolutely convinced that Kevin looks down upon you all with so much pride and love. Thank you for being your father’s and mother’s children…you learned from the absolute best about this business called living. Love, Kathy


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